I heard the question in an early December morning and it has continued to echo within my mind. Is it the echo of a question being reverberated around in my heart or is it the continuing whisper of the Spirit seeking my attention.
"You are blessed when...." The sentence is not completed, only the question being asked of me. "You are blessed when...".
When you whisper in the dome of St. Paul's Cathedral your words return to you each time. In this old and majestic building there is one place that will allow you to know the reality of the words you utter being returned to you.
Again the words come "you are blessed when..." - it comes again.Not just when do I "feel" blessed but rather when do I "know", as in soul knowing, I am blessed? The question penetrates through the layers within me.
Celebration is the word that comes to mind as I try to answer that question, finding the point of celebration in each day. All 365 of them.
Am I blessed when I can celebrate? If I am willing to find a celebration moment in each day I will live more deeply in gratitude. Yes, I want to live with an "attitude of gratitude" along with the attitude of celebration.
Am I blessed when I play more? Playing often is simply enjoying the moment and gift of today which not only relaxes me but it also draws me into holy space where I seem to laugh more with the Almighty, and feel incredibly alive. Yes, if I play more my sense of wonder and delight in life increases, and I want that space in my soul enlarged.
Am I blessed when I feel lost? When I feel lost my only place of safety has become solitude, which opens me up to the solace of sacred intimate space with the Almighty. When I feel lost I am again reminded that my heart is at home, and this is the place I am to be at this place in time in my life.
Am I blessed when I have questions that seem to have no answers? Questions that are unanswered - do I keep asking or do I let them go? Are they questions from my wants or from my needs? Does it make a difference which they are? Perhaps simply asking the questions reminds me that I am seeking the Almighty,seeking answers from someOne beyond my humanness, in holy presence and holy intimacy. Unanswered questions definitely are one way to keep me communicating with Abba, and yes I am blessed because I know there is nothing I cannot ask or talk to Abba about. I want to get to know Abba's heart through the asking of my questions.
Am I blessed when I weep? On my hand I wear a ring that symbolically reminds me that every tear is a diamond. Eugene Petersen translated it well: "you are blessed when the tears flow freely. Joy comes in the morning." Joy has not always arrived "in the morning", but when I let the tears fall freely and then wait in sacred silence I find Shalom surrounding me like a warm flannel blanket to stop my shivering after awaking from surgery. Perhaps tears hold a million questions that can only be translated by the Almighty, who alone reads my heart and knows the reason they fall.
Is this question an echo - uttered only once and then reverberating back, or is it being gently whispered every day, new and fresh? An echo comes when I speak in the vastness of space but this question comes in the enclosed place of being with the Almighty. My questions is answered - it isn't an echo in the vastness of the universe but rather a whispering from One who lives within me, the Spirit of God with me.
Again it prompts me: "you are blessed when...".
And I can reply "I am blessed".